Seva – my trauma: service to people or rather service to God in the solitude of the hermitage?
After my spiritual awakening, life in the world no longer seemed futile and empty to me. The only thing that made sense to me was service to suffering people. My motto at the time was: “Until I know who I am, I shall serve!” That is why I joined the ranks of Catholic charity and became a charity caregiver for the sick and all sorts of handicapped and disabled fellow citizens. It gave me a deep sense of fulfilment and I was happy that this service was freely available and open to us amateurs. I remember they had a big cross on the wall, which reassured me that I was in the right place. So I lived by serving people, bathing them, dressing them and taking them for walks. At that time, my relationship with my girlfriend came to a head. That was in 1997. I wanted to become independent and a hermit, but I had no idea how to break up. In the end, it became a great ordeal due to the internal attachment between the two of us. But with the Love given to my suffering patients, I somehow overcame my personal suffering and continued on the spiritual journey. I gained a lot of experience that way. Then I became a lonely hermit and I am very happy that I went through all that. I learned to give Love. I am grateful to God for that. I gained spiritual energy and insight, wisdom, experience that not everyone has. That was my karma yoga. But then I was overcome with longing for the mountains and for a free life. That is why I was hired for hard labour in the highest Czech mountains, the Giant Mountains. We made hiking trails in the most beautiful places of the local mountain wilderness. I worked from spring to autumn and left for the winter to meditate in the mountain caves with a rich financial reward.
© Swami Gyaneshwarpuri
E-mail: yoga@gyaneshwarpuri.cz
Web: www.hermityoga.cz
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SWAMI GYANESHWARPURI POUSTEVNÍK
